Think twice before you speak

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

I sometimes say to my daughters that if they don’t have anything good to say, they shouldn’t say anything at all.

It happened to us all. That one time you just said something before thinking about it and it left you with blushed cheeks. It’s out there. You can’t ever take it back. No matter what you say next, the damage is done.

I recently had the privilege to coach a couple of head boys and –head girls from my local community. The one thing they all had in common doing the Life Purpose Exercise is that they all want to have a positive influence. They want to change lives. They want to leave a legacy behind.

Interesting enough, the young influencers clearly saw the need for influential leadership. The one boy made me think when he said: Sir, they will remember me not for what I did, but for how I made them feel. Wow!!  An old saying, but still very powerful.

So it is really important to think before you speak, especially if you want to have a positive influence. Remember: Thinking is speaking to ourselves, and speaking is thinking to others.

In a conversation people are emotionally engaged with all their life experiences. When somebody else is speaking, listen. Listen with everything you’ve got. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying - feel what they are saying - think about it, and respond if necessary.

Think what you are going to say and choose the best body language to accompany those words. Words only come to their full potential when the body language accompanying them gives the feeling of authenticity.

How can you speak more thoughtfully?

1. Talk slowly. We cannot talk and think simultaneously. To think, you must physically stop talking! So when we are in talk mode, especially fast talk mode, we are in a zone of no thinking. To wake the thinking brain, we must stop talking. Great thinkers know this, and will use lines like, "Let me think about that for a moment."

2. Be a thoughtful person. We react with who we are. If you are a more thoughtful individual, what you say instinctively will reflect that. If you wish to speak more thoughtfully, become a more thoughtful person. Just become smarter. SMART people talk less, but when they talk everyone listens.

The first step to leaving a legacy behind is to speak from the heart. Be genuine in the choosing of your words. Let your body language fully support your words. Give yourself time to think. Your words WILL have an influence. Choose them to perfection.

Good luck!